{"id":141,"date":"2022-12-15T13:28:24","date_gmt":"2022-12-15T18:28:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/?page_id=141"},"modified":"2025-06-27T07:55:12","modified_gmt":"2025-06-27T12:55:12","slug":"orientation","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/coming-to-the-dungeon\/orientation\/","title":{"rendered":"Orientation"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>We\u2019ll review all of this info in detail during your first visit to the dungeon, along with a tour and time for you to ask all those questions you\u2019ve been too shy to post online. \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\udd0e First Visit Requirements:<\/strong><br>When you arrive, you\u2019ll need to:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Show a\u00a0<strong>state or federally issued photo ID<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Sign a liability waiver<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Use your\u00a0<strong>legal name<\/strong>\u00a0(we\u2019ll also make note of your birthdate)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Why?<\/strong><br>Because we\u2019re going to check you out. Not to gatekeep over an old traffic ticket\u2014but to ensure we maintain a safe and welcoming space. Our goal is to keep out the riffraff, not nitpick your past.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>The Society \u2013 2025 Orientation<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83c\udfe0 Ms. Di\u2019s Property<\/strong><br>The Dungeon &amp; Studio are on&nbsp;<strong>private property.<\/strong>&nbsp;Treat the space with&nbsp;<strong>care and respect<\/strong>.<br><strong>Ms. Di\u2019s house is off-limits<\/strong>&nbsp;unless you have permission from her, a board member, or a Red Band.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\udd16 Lanyards &amp; Roles<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Yellow<\/strong>\u00a0\u2013 \u201cRookie Stripe\u201d (1st 3 parties). You&#8217;re new\u2014we\u2019ve got your back.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Black<\/strong>\u00a0\u2013 Vetted member. Ask them questions!<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Red<\/strong>\u00a0\u2013 Red Bands (RBs) &amp; board members. Our trusted leaders, dungeon monitors, and go-to help.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>RBs wear red armbands<\/strong>&nbsp;and handle safety, questions, and enforcement.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83e\udded Dungeon &amp; Studio Basics<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Break something?<\/strong>\u00a0Tell a Red Band or Ms. Di ASAP.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Ask before using<\/strong>\u00a0Dungeon toys.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Studio<\/strong>\u00a0= open play area (rope, impact, primal).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Medical Room<\/strong>\u00a0= ask permission before using anything.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Lounge\/Kitche<\/strong>n = social only. No play.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Outdoor Pavilion<\/strong>\u00a0= casual space and pre-arranged messy play (ask first!).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\udd10 Privacy<\/strong><br>Respect everyone\u2019s&nbsp;<strong>privacy and identity<\/strong>. No photos, no name-dropping, no outing. Ever.<br>Don&#8217;t ask personal questions (real name, job, etc.).<br>Violation = possible ban.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\udc55 Dress Code<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Dungeon\/Studio parties<\/strong>: Casual to full fetish. Nudity OK\u2014use a barrier on seats.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Public events (dinners, whips-in-the-park, etc.): Vanilla casual only.<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Movie and Game nights<\/strong>: Casual or PJs.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Be clean<\/strong>\u00a0Hygiene matters. No strong scents or body odor.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\udeab Rules on Substances &amp; Safety<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>No alcohol.<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>No illegal substances.<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>No solicitation<\/strong>\u00a0(no gifts or money in exchange for play\/sex).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Smoking\/vaping<\/strong>\u00a0outside only\u2014not near doorways.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>No firearms.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83c\udfa9 Protocol &amp; Respect<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Titles (Sir, Mistress, etc.) are\u00a0<strong>not required<\/strong>. Don\u2019t assume submission.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Respect personal dynamics and protocols. If you don\u2019t like it, walk away.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Follow house norms: quiet during announcements, be respectful in public.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\udcf5 Basic Respect Rules<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Phones on silent. Take calls outside.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>No photos without full permission.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Don\u2019t touch people\/toys\/gear without consent.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Don\u2019t interrupt scenes. Don\u2019t hover or crowd the space.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Be quiet during scenes. Use social areas for chatting.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Respect scene space\u2014even if empty.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Don\u2019t join or comment on scenes unless invited.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Clean up after yourself.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\ud83d\uded1 Safewords &amp; Signals<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Yellow<\/strong>\u00a0= Slow down \/ check in<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Red<\/strong>\u00a0= STOP now<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8211;<strong>Mayday<\/strong>&nbsp;= Emergency \u2013 Outside assistance is needed immediately<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Hand Signals<\/strong>\u00a0(for gagged play):<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>\ud83d\udc4d\ud83d\udc4d = Green<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>\ud83d\udc4d = Yellow<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Jazz hands = Red<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Two squeezes<\/strong>&nbsp;= safety check when hands are restricted<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\u2699\ufe0f Scene Etiquette &amp; Play Rules<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Watching = eyes &amp; ears only<\/strong>\u00a0Don\u2019t comment or disrupt.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>No sexual activity of any kind is permitted, regardless of the genders or identities of the people involved.<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Edgeplay<\/strong>\u00a0(CNC, breath play, needles, etc.)? Notify Ms. Di or RB first.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Messy play<\/strong>\u00a0= Ask first &amp; use plastic. Scat is not allowed.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Don\u2019t abandon your bottom<\/strong>\u00a0\u2014if you must leave, get a RB to step in.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Try something new?<\/strong>\u00a0Ask for a mentor or monitor.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Gag loud bottoms<\/strong>\u2014we have neighbors.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Compliment &amp; ask questions AFTER scenes\/aftercare are done.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\u2705 Consent, Negotiation &amp; Boundaries<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Only YES means yes.<\/strong>\u00a0\u201cMaybe later\u201d = no.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>\u201cNo\u201d is healthy. Practice using and respecting it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Consent can be revoked at any time.<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Don\u2019t touch anyone without asking\u2014yes once doesn\u2019t mean yes forever.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Negotiate before play.<\/strong>\u00a0Be specific. Avoid renegotiating mid-scene.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Creepy behavior?<\/strong>\u00a0Persistent asking? Let a Red Band know.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>\u2753Still Have Questions?<\/strong><br>Reach out to Ms. Di, a Red Band, or Board Member. We\u2019re here to help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We\u2019ll review all of this info in detail during your first visit to the dungeon, along with a tour and time for you to ask all those questions you\u2019ve been&#8230;<\/p>\n<p class=\"more-link-wrap\"><a href=\"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/coming-to-the-dungeon\/orientation\/\" class=\"more-link\">Read More<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &ldquo;Orientation&rdquo;<\/span> &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":137,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-141","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/141","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=141"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/141\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":337,"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/141\/revisions\/337"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/137"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thesocietybdsm.com\/bdsm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=141"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}